Valentine’s Day 2019 Get Out of That Rut!

Lucha Va Voom. Photo by Hon Hoang.

Not Another Candlelit Dinner! Had enough of overpriced, predictable “romantic” dinners? Break out of your rut with these exciting Valentine’s Day Activities! Since Valentine’s Day this year is on a Thursday, there are also events on the weekends before and after the holiday. Try something new!

CHECK OUT MEXICAN MASKED WRESTLING AND BURLESQUE

Thursday 2/14 & Friday 2/15   8 p.m.   $35 – $55   Rated R

Los Angeles’ wildest variety show is back with their annual Valentine’s spectacular! Lucha VaVOOM brings together Mexican Masked Wrestling, Burlesque, and Comedy at the gorgeous Mayan Theater in DTLA. Wednesday, Feb. 13, 2018, and Thursday, Feb. 14, 2018, their special show, titled “Amor Prohibido,” will bring you Lucha Libre-style wrestling, exciting burlesque dancers, aerialists, hula hoops, low riders, comedy, live music, and lots of tequila.

Multimedia artist CHRISTEENE, “a gender-blending, booty-pounding, perversion of punk with a fully equipped arsenal of ferocious music intertwined with raw moments of strained intimacy and fiery stank will be performing on a bill loaded with talent like Russian-born, L.A.-based alternative “fetish” model and burlesque performer MOSH, dancer and fire performer Erica Snap, contortionist and pole artist Brynn Route. Also thrill to special guest commentator Ron Funches, Lucha superstar Rey Fénix from Mexico, LV crowd favorite luchadora Dama Fina, and Tijuana’s flamboyant gender-bending exótico Ruby Gardena.

21+ event open at 7 p.m.  and the show goes from 8 – 11 p.m. Tickets are on sale now at $35.00 for general admission tickets (includes balcony and mezzanine seats) and $55.00 for ringside seating.

DO YOU PREFER YOUR BURLESQUE WITH LESS LUCHA LIBRE? Rated R

There are a lot of cool burlesque shows around LA (21+), here is a sample:

Saturday 2/9 11 a.m. A Very Vaudeville Valentines at Brack Shop Tavern in LA.

Thursday 2/14 8:30 p.m. Sex & Candy Burlesque will be celebrating Valentine’s day at Harvelle’s on the Westside. Try one of Damien’s specially crafted dessert cocktails.

Thursday 2/14 9 p.m. Explore Fetishes in the Be My Valentine Burlesque Show at Club Burlesque – North Hollywood. $6.50 & $13

Thursday 2/14 9 p.m. & 2/15 11 p.m. The Dollface Dames & Lola Boutée presents a sassy and sexy night of entertainment at The Smoky Hollow Tasting & Taproom and R6 Distillery in El Segundo, a real speakeasy. Dress to impress. $30 – $150.

2/16 10 p.m. For a cute and quirky burlesque show, St Valentine’s Day Assacre will present comedic monologues and highly original dance numbers from burlesque group Victress at the Lyric Hyperion Theatre & Cafe.

GET WILD! FOREVER WILD SANCTUARY OFFERS “EXTREME FEEDING!”

Saturday 2/9 & Sunday 2/10 from 10 – 5 p.m. & Thursday 2/14 noon – 5 p.m.  $10/$20   Rated G

Some things are worth a trip out to San Bernadino County. This is one of them. Did I mention extreme feeding? The Forever Wild Sanctuary in Phelan, California is not a zoo and it is not a roadside attraction. It is a rescue. For us, it is a chance to see big cats in an environment where they are nurtured and cared for. And fed. Extremely. By YOU. We are talking tigers. We are talking raw meat. Seriously! Extreme Feeds are only an additional $10 and stop at 3 p.m. Note that “Big Cats involved in feeding vary and you may not get to feed the specific cat you request.” Wear closed toe shoes. All ages welcome. 100% non profit.

GEEK OUT WITH ANIME AT THE MAID CAFE IN ALHAMBRA

Saturday 2/9 8 p.m. – 12 a.m.   FREE   Rated PG

Welcome to Daisuki!— A Valentine’s Maid Cafe Party! Both couples and singles are welcome. Enjoy two stories of fun, with a chill space, anime video room, game room, and Toyzilla shop on the first floor. On the second story you can enjoy food like their famous curry rice plate, drinks, games, prizes and performances, speed dating, and dancing to DJ Synthos and DJ Eteru playing your favorite anime/game mixes. They will also be auctioning off dates with your favorite Kiss Pink cutie. 21+ only, ID check strictly enforced. Free parking.

GET YOUR MOTOR RUNNING. HEAD OUT ON THE HIGHWAY

Sunday 2/10 10:30 a.m.   FREE   Rating: Whatever you make it

Join the staff of Bartels’ Harley Davidson as they lead a ride through Pacific Coast Highway with beautiful coast views, stopping at Neptune’s Net in Malibu, for some excellent seafood, or just a beer if you are thirsty from the road. Meet at Bartels’ Harley-Davidson in Marina del Rey for coffee and sweets between 9 a.m.- 10 a.m. Kickstands up by 10:30 a.m.

GET IREE WITH LOVER’S ROCK IN GRAND PARK

Thursday 2/14   6 p.m. – 11 p.m.  FREE  Rated G

Grand Park is offering a free and relaxed evening in the park with Dub Club DJs spinning laid-back Reggae. Bring your own picnic or try something from one of the participating food trucks that will be selling desserts and other treats. Enjoy the twinkling lights in the trees and tables for two around the fountain with beautiful views of City Hall. There will also be a photo booth and a family-friendly Valentine craft activity will be available for a small fee. Park furniture is available on a first come, first served basis.

DINE WITH THE FISHES

Thursday 2/14  7:00 p.m.-9:30 p.m.  $89 / $109 Rated G

The Aquarium of the Pacific in Long Beach is offering a special Valentines Day dinner in the actual aquarium. Not in the water though, which would definitely be exciting. However, you will dine in the Great Hall with a huge 2-story aquarium to enjoy (Don’t order the fish!). Upgrade to VIP for $20 more per person to dine in the Northern Pacific and Tropical Pacific galleries upstairs. Enjoy drinks on the Veranda from 6:30 p.m. to 7:30 p.m. and watch the sun set over the water (Cash Bar).

GO ON THE RUN WITH TRUE ROMANCE

Thursday 2/14   7:30 p.m. – 11 p.m.  The movie is literally Rated R

Inspired by the Christian Slater and Patricia Arquette as young lovers on the run in Quentin Tarantino’s True Romance, Cinespia’s Valentine’s Party features five floors of live music, DJs, drinking and dancing. There will also be a free photobooth, and of course, True Romance on the big screen in what is probably the most gorgeous theater in LA. Dress code: cocktail, movie inspired, and truly romantic looks. This event is all ages, but you must be 21+ to drink, and since the movie is rated R, people under 18 might not have a lot of fun. Cinespia at the Los Angeles Theatre 615 S Broadway Los Angeles, CA 90014.

MAKE YOUR DATE SCREAM AT “MY BLOODY VALENTINE” SCREENING

Thursday 2/14  7 p.m.  $16.00  Rated R

As part of their Beers and Fears series, Screamfest invites you to the Chinese 6 Theaters at Hollywood and Highland to watch My Bloody Valentine while clutching at your valentine for dear life. It’s also in 3-D, so you get to have pickaxes thrown right into your face. The film is about a Valentine’s Day massacre that claimed the lives of nearly two dozen people in a creepy mining town. The only survivor returns to town after inheriting the mine, so naturally, he wakes up the killer and is blamed for the murders himself. In addition to the film, there will be photo ops, a trivia contest and exciting prizes. People over 21 will also receive a complimentary beer. Doors at 7 p.m., movie at 7:30 p.m. $3 validated parking. Since you’re right there, you can start the evening off with a spooky cocktail in the bar at the famously haunted Roosevelt Hotel across the street. Their burger joint also has Guinness milkshakes.

SUPPORT PLANNED PARENTHOOD WITH KATHLEEN HANNA, ADAM HOROWITZ & DEVANDRA BANHART

Thursday 2/14   8 p.m.  $35 to $40  Rated PG

Panache’s Valentine’s Day Village of Love is an annual benefit concert for Planned Parenthood. This year performers include Bikini Kill’s Kathleen Hanna, Adam Horovitz of the Beastie Boys, and Bane’s World with folk singer Devendra Banhart DJ-ing. The show will be taking place at the Teragram Ballroom with doors at 7 p.m. and bands at 8 p.m. This benefit is open to all ages.

VALENTINES DAY WITH ANGELYNE

Thursday 2/14 9:00 p.m.   FREE   Rated PG

Angelyne, the queen of the billboard, was once a kitschy oddity and has over time become a beloved LA icon. Come party at her video release party at Zebulon in Frogtown. There will be an “extra special raffle prize. Our guess? A ride with Angelyne in her famous pink corvette. Zebulon will be decorate in a My Bloody Valentine prom theme with a kissing booth, pink drinks and DJs Olive Kimoto and Paige Emery. The Zebulon has an excellent cafe with mind-blowing grilled toast called Bub’s Bread. Order it with cheese and charcuterie for a romantic hands-on meal. Or you can dine a block away at Salazar’s, but you will need reservations and $30 to $60 bucks a person. 21 and over. Zebulon 2478 N Fletcher Dr. Los Angeles, CA.

RISE WITH AERIALISTS + CONTORTIONISTS AT THE CIRQUE

Saturday 2/16 & Sunday 2/17   7:30 p.m.  $69 – $255  Rated PG-13

Pole Show LA will presenting an all-new show on Valentine’s weekend. The Vegas Cirque-style show features performances in pole, hoop, contortion and heels! Yes, walking in heels IS as hard as a circus act, thank you for recognizing! 70 international performers will be part of the big professionally choreographed show at the Avalon Hollywood for two shows, Saturday and Sunday. RISE starts at 7:30 p.m., with doors opening at 6:30. Tickets vary from SRO to VIP. 21 and over.

TAKE A BITE OUT OF SOMEONE AT THE VAMPIRE BALL

Sunday 2/17 9 p.m. – 3 a.m. $35 – $105  Rated PG-13

International author and impresario Father Sebastiaan presents Endless Night: Los Angeles Vampire Ball on Sunday, February 17, 2019,  9 p.m. to 3 a.m. at the legendary Globe Theatre in DTLA. Endless Night promotes themed vampire events in places like New Orleans, Paris and Berlin. The Vampire Ball’s theme this year is Anti-Valentines Day. There will be a “live” performance by the Cruxshadows.

If you have never been to one of these events before, it’s all about dressing up, and the dress code merits its own web page. “Bring out your deepest and finest reds, Victorian, Edwardian, Latex, Pagan, Elegant gowns, Tophats, Black Tie, Cloaks and Capes…When in doubt wear all black. Be fabulous and amazing! Fangs, SFX contacts and Legacy Ankhs encouraged but not required.” Gates open at 9pm for VIPs, 10 p.m. for GA and the party keeps going until 2:30 a.m.

CAPTURE THE MOMENT WITH THE REAL LOVE OF YOUR LIFE

Saturday 2/16 9:00 a.m. – NOON  $45  Rated G

Schedule a 15-minute mini-shoot featuring you and your animal companion with photographer Alicia Rius of Frame Your Pet. If you must, you can also include your human companion. Photos may include up to five human companions and three animal companions and any props you would like to include. You will receive five retouched photos in high resolution delivered digitally in 48-72 hours. You can also purchase prints.

GET MORTIFIED ONSTAGE!

Saturday 2/16 6 p.m. & 9 p.m.  $17.50-$40  Rated PG

Mortified’s Annual Doomed Valentine Show will return to Wonderlust on February 16th with two showings. The first will be from 6 p.m. until 8 p.m., and the second show will be from 9 p.m. until 11 p.m. If you have never seen the show, “Mortified,” you should check it out on YouTube. Average people, just like me and you, read their diaries, rejection letters, heartsick poems and other humiliating residue from their emotional pasts for the enjoyment and edification of a sympathetic audience. It is ROMANCE-THEMED, so you know it’s going to be excruciating! Experience a night of food, drink, diaries, teenage heartbreak and laughter. 17.50 for Gen Admission and $40 for the VIP Section.

GET KINKY AT THE FETISH BALL

Saturday 2/16  9:30 p.m. – ???  $27 – $669  Rated   R / X

Love and Lust presents their Valentine Fetish Ball, “My Kinky Valentine,” for both first-timers and experienced kinksters, for couples and singles alike. Professional Enjoy go-go dancers, two bars, chill areas, a photo booth, open kink zones, and Metal Grinder performers. There will be multiple rooms for dancing and for getting kinky. There is a VIP room for getting intimate. You will probably see nudity and a variety of S&M acts. You may or may not be invited to participate. You don’t have to do anything at all. If you get the VIP pass or hook up with a VIP, things are most certainly going to be X-rated. Dress code: Skin (but you must cover your naughty bits), costumes, lingerie, gothic wear, fetish wear, and red, white and black.

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Elise Thompson

About Elise Thompson

Born and raised in the great city of Los Angeles, this food, culture and music-loving punk rock angeleno wants to turn you on to all that is funky, delicious and weird in the city. While Elise holds down the fort, her adventurous alter ego Kiki Maraschino is known to roam the country in search of catfish.
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2 Responses to Valentine’s Day 2019 Get Out of That Rut!

  1. Scoping L.A. says:

    Man, this is the best!!! So many cool things to do, yet so little time.

  2. I want to go to EVERYTHING <3

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